Though I have my doubts that Schmooie is on a very famous Jewish dating site, I finally swallowed my pride, ripped off the bandaid, and joined that ridiculous famous Jewish dating site. See, I've been a member for many years, but never took it seriously. All I ever found on there were old dudes making advances or young dudes looking to get drunk. Now, I've decided to have a more open mind, so I paid for a subscription to that famous Jewish dating site. Three months for the price of one! I'll probably need a prescription when the subscription runs out. Alrighty then, in that vain, I share a very amusing profile by a fancy person who wrote the following in the "About Me" section of his profile:
"I like brains and balance. I like good food and seek Kosher or organic. I like travel.I like to bike, swim and don't ever touch the bathroom door knob. I want a fun girl. classy adn educated. i don't have time to teach you ettiquette. you better know your stuff. Ok, UPDATE, UPDATE...I've been looking at pictures of some ladies on here. . How can you let yourselve's go like that??? Do some push ups and hit the gym. Lay off the Bon Bons."
You know what I like? Someone who can type properly. You know, someone who puts spaces between sentences and knows how to use capitalization, punctuation, and spelling. Seesh, I put thought into my "About Me" section and actually read it a few times before posting it. This guy is just looking to spill his spleen and see if anyone actually cares. Bon-bons? Does anyone eat bon-bons nowadays? Is this really what I'm going to be dealing with on that very famous Jewish dating site? On top of this, you can see when the person signs on and off this famous Jewish dating site. He appears to sign-in at least once an hour. Good luck with that! You're so not Schmooie!
See--you're making progress already. Cross that dud off tha list, girlfriend. (PS--bon-bons are SOOOo last decade. It's lollicakes now. Duh.)
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